Because it’s black Friday…
Yes, today is traditionally the single busiest shopping day of the year. To mark this occasion, I took it upon myself to compile a fanciful list of Holiday advertisements for you reading pleasure… take em slow and with asprin.
The Holiday Shopping Ads you WON’T be seeing any time soon (at least I hope not).
“oh, oh, oh, Merry X-Lax!”
“The New and Improved Winchester 30.06 DaisyCutter… because there’s bigger sport than ducks in the air at Christmas…”
“Toyota Cars… Because at Christmas, everybody loves getting ‘Toys’…”
“Colt Handcuffs… making your Kinky Kristmas Komplete”
“For unwelcome inlaws or Holiday Hangovers, try Excedrin!”
“‘Still can’t believe you ate the whole thing? Neither can we…’– Jenny Craig”
“Are ‘wii’ having fun yet?– Nintendo”
“Wii have all your money– Nintendo”
“Krazy Glue… Keeping the family ‘together’ for the Holidays… are they just stuck on you? Well, they will be.”
“Wal Mart… where did you think Santa got the idea for making cheap stuff with slave labor in a wasteland nobody knows about anyway?”
“Grey Goose Vodka: No matter what happens or who visits, it truly can be the most wonderful time of the year.”
And the not so honerable mention…. Not a shopping advert, but a public service announcement.
“UNICEF Anti-Aids campaign…. Some presents are better left wrapped.”