I MAY be Overthinking This…
I despise Children’s Television… not necessarily because it is made for people half my age and three-quarters my maturity level (or a quarter my age and half my maturity level as the case may be), but mostly because of the bad message that it tends to portray. I will expound upon this further in this post… suffice it to say right now that I think Children’s television is mostly evil.
I must admit here that I was thinking about this at work… and work seems to be the greatest inspiration of blogging that I have. So the Bullseye is good for something (let the reader understand). So yeah, we closed at ten, and during the mind-numbing task of straightening up the shelves in the ensuing hour, I got to let my mind wander a bit. Wouldn’t you know it, I was in the toy department, right next to the Thomas the Tank Engine toys… and suddenly one of them came alive. It was singing the theme song. Now, I remember watching Thomas the Tank Engine growing up, and it was awesome… Thomas, Percy, Henry, the grouchy coal cars… it was clean, lighthearted fun. But the new theme song has given a name to this circle of friendly engines… “The really useful crew”… So, much like Rudolpho the Communist-Schnozed Comrade (long story, ask me later), you only have value in this twisted little world if you are willing and able to work hard and get a lot done with little reward other than the warm fuzzies and “good friendship”. So to access Thomas the Engine’s inner-sanctum, you have to be an able-bodied individual with a good work ethic. Who knew that Communism, Eugenics, and Social Darwinism are all found in Thomas the Tank Engine?
Or how about PBS’ newest little plaything… “Handy Manny”… “HANDY” MANNY?!?! First off you have a children’s show about a hispanic dude who is a manual laborer… how disparaging and stereotypical! Secondly, this guy has value because his name is derived by his value to overall society… if he wasn’t “handy”, not only would he not have a show, he wouldn’t HAVE A NAME! I have a children’s show for you! “Utterly worthless Fred”! He is ‘between jobs’, lacks a social life, and spends most of his time in his mother’s living room chatting on the internet, but God LIKES HIM! Somehow, I don’t think the cross-merchandising people would be halfway as excited about this proposition.